You never know what might come out of a Chewonki reunion—deep conversations that rekindle your sense of purpose, a renewed connection to the place that shaped you, or… your future spouse. Just ask Ruby Koch-Fienberg (Semester 47) and Ben Surface (Semester 43), who met around a campfire at the 2018 Alumni Reunion and tied the knot this May.
With Homecoming just around the corner—next Saturday, August 23—Ruby shares how that weekend connection grew into a marriage rooted in shared values, community, and a little Chewonki magic.
Let’s start at the beginning—Do you remember anything about that moment at the 2018 Alumni Reunion when you first met or exchanged numbers?
Of course! The famous moment! We met around a campfire at Chewonki in Wiscasset, Maine. My friend Evelysse (Semester 47) overheard Ben say the words ‘North Carolina’ and figured that was enough grounds to drag me into a conversation. I had just moved to Asheville and Ben was moving back after law school in Vermont.. I thought Ben would be a good source of info about my new town, and Ben thought… I was cute. I remember we both were up early one morning and ended up chatting on the porch of the Wallace since we were the only ones awake! We exchanged numbers on Sunday around the Adirondacks and agreed to go on a hike when we were both back in the mountains.
From semester friends to matchmaker: Evelysse (right) was there for Ruby (left) at Chewonki, and later played a key role in introducing her to Ben. This photo was taken during a Maine Coast Semester field trip back in Fall ’11.
What was it like exploring your unique Maine Coast Semester experiences together? Any funny or surprising connections?
Because our semesters were so close together we were able to share a lot of similar memories about staff and activities. We both had fond memories of time in the Farm with Megan Phillips, pestering Peter Sniffen on field trips, and most importantly how Chewonki bent the trajectories of our lives since. Funnily enough, one of Ben’s closest friends during his semester Emma Longcope, is a sibling with one of my closest friends from my semester, Claire Longcope. Their mom, who knew both of us separately, cried when she found out we were dating!
How has your shared Chewonki background shaped your relationship? Are there values or memories from your semester experiences that still show up in your life together?
The values we both developed at Chewonki play a huge roll in our life and relationship now. We both deeply value building community, stewardship of the land, and service of others. This has informed the work we do, the place we’ve chosen to live and the way we try to show up for each other. We work to make our home a place of warmth and crowded dinner tables as often as possible and we devote as much of our time to caring for our land as we can spare!
From tidepools to tying the knot—Ben Surface (left) during a Maine Coast Semester field lab during the fall ’09. Ben finished is fall semester two years before Ruby, who visited the same tidepools in fall ’11.
Did your Chewonki values (like appreciation for the natural world, for example) influence how you planned your wedding?
Absolutely. We got married at our house, with the party at our go-to local pizza joint. We brought together our extended families, old friends (and many chewonki alum), and new found Hudson Valley community for a weekend of contra dancing, good local food and happy tears that felt straight out of a Chewonki playbook. It was a celebration of our land as well as our community!
Ruby Koch-Fienberg, Semester 47 (white dress, center) and Ben Surface, Semester 43 (right) met at a Chewonki reunion in 2018. Here they are at their wedding in the Hudson Valley this summer with fellow Chewonki alums, left to right, Yona Koch Fienberg, Semester 40; Claire Longcope, Semester 47; Eliana Langer, Semester 47; and Evelysse Vargas, Semester 47.
What are you and Ben up to now?
We live on the eastern side of the Hudson Valley. I (Ruby) am the Agriculture and Food Systems Coordinator for Cornell Cooperative Extension working on purchasing food from local farmers for food pantries and food security plans for municipalities. Ben is a supervising attorney for Hudson Valley Justice Center, providing free legal services to low income folks facing eviction and housing insecurity. At home we are managing a 7-acre homestead with cows, goats, chickens and dogs and 1/4 acre veggie garden. For now we are growing for ourselves but we have big dreams of starting to participate in local farmers markets!
With our full time jobs and full on farming responsibilities, every day is a bit of an adventure, but we are also planning a big adventure down to Colombia for the winter as our honeymoon during the cold months while the weeds aren’t growing!
What would you say to a fellow alum who’s thinking about coming to Homecoming this year? Why is it worth showing up?
Homecoming is an opportunity to reconnect with people, but also to reconnect with the space that fostered so much personal growth for us. While so much of the Chewonki experience is inextricable from the people you share it with, there is part of homecoming that allows you to reconnect with the sense of yourself you had back when you were a student there—the idealism, optimism, and sense of belonging—that can be re-energizing to take back to your day-to-day life. It’s a little like recharging a battery. It reminds you that there are all these incredible people out there in the world who understand the values of place and community, and who you share a core memory with.
Ruby (middle row, purple shorts), and Ben (back row, sunglasses), at the fateful 2018 Chewonki reunion where sparks first flew.
A big thank-you to Ruby and Ben for sharing their story—and for reminding us of the unexpected ways Chewonki connections can grow. Whether you’re catching up with old friends, making new ones, or simply soaking in the sense of place that makes Chewonki special, we hope you’ll join us for this year’s Homecoming on Saturday, August 23.
